“My daughter who is gorgeous and flirty like her Mom, deserves to grow up in a world where she isn’t expected to perform like a porn star”
One of the many joys of working at MLNP is being able to read incredible emails like this one, and being reminded that there are so many great people out there who share our core mission! We love hearing from you.
Hi Cindy!
I saw your Ted Talk on Facebook last year and shared it immediately!
I am recently divorced, my ex was addicted to porn and I believe it contributed
greatly to the downfall of our marriage. He used porn as an escape, to not deal
with his issues or our problems. He often had a difficult time getting aroused or staying aroused but insisted on daily performance by me to prove something. He also became violent and I have read a few studies that say that daily diet of porn consumption can lead men to be aggressive and violent towards women because of the largely violent images that hardcore porn normalizes by objectifying females, and by the lack of hands touching in the videos.
I have been dating younger men since leaving my husband and online dating also encourages this fantasy of immediate sexual engagement and that it is a woman’s job to make the man cum, whom she may have never met before in real life. I’m sexually adventurous, thinking I must be attracting this type of man but it’s been nearly everyone of them who have displayed this as normal sexual behavior.
I do find that younger men don’t want to wear condoms, especially if they think you won’t see them cum. They do all want to cum on your face or your tits, say super aggressive things. Don’t get me wrong, I have enjoyed most of the sex I have had with these partners but all of them have taken talking to and coaching and I think about if I was a younger woman would I have the balls to correct them and ask for what I want? I’m not sure I would.
I have an 11 year old son and 8 year old daughter. My son was first exposed to porn on his Dad’s computer at 8. Soon we found that he was searching phrases on Youtube. We punished him for this at 8.
Recently, at 11, he was crying and calling my name because he had started a youtube search and this time all kinds of windows were popping up with images that frightened him. I’m grateful in a way because this has started regular talks, prompted by him about sex, porn, rape, videos, relationships, etc and now I am the sex educator for him instead of friends and the internet.
I don’t want my son to grow up and mistreat women but also I don’t want him to grow up and not know how to enjoy the reality of sexual expression and a loving relationship. I have expressed this to him and he seems to be getting it.
Likewise, my daughter who is gorgeous and flirty like her Mom, deserves to grow up in a world where she isn’t expected to perform like a porn star. She shouldn’t have to be bullied into sending sex videos or pics to a potential interest because all the other girls are expected to do it. It is a very different world now.
There is someone that I am seeing that I met online, and I find myself having to re-educate him on what intimacy and really hot sex is like. I know I have said so much in this email, but your mission moves me. I would love to help change the conversation.
You can read more of the incredible emails that we get by checking out the #realworldinbox section of our blog!
One Response to ““My daughter who is gorgeous and flirty like her Mom, deserves to grow up in a world where she isn’t expected to perform like a porn star””
Reblogged this on CougarBunny Doris Dawn.